The Most Influential People in a Teenager’s Life

“Train a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not turn from it.” Proverbs 22:6

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I never cease to be amazed at the indoctrinational garbage the world throws at our kids.

It’s continual. And seems to always reach new lows. Most every message on television, movies, song lyrics and celebrity is a chorus of rebellion to the truths of Scripture. Some of my biggest peeves:

encouragement of sexual immorality with no consequence,
laziness and disrespect to authority;
no absolutes of right and wrong
utter denial of accountability to anyone much less to our Creator one day.

And clothing? Don’t even get me started. Finding clothes for a teenage girl that doesn’t promote her being a hoochy-mama is nearly impossible.

Honestly, raising kids in a social media/red carpet age can be very discouraging. When weighing positive vs negative influences, I often feel very outnumbered.

But praise be to God, there’s hope!

I’m reading a book called, How to Get your Teen to Talk to You.* I’m pleasantly surprised at what I learning. While television, social media and a child’s friends are influential, they are not the most influential.

Drum roll please…

The most influential people in a teenager’s life are:

Parents
Extended Family
Adults outside the home – coaches, youth workers, teachers, friends of parents
Peers
Media – TV, movies social media and music

Whether we know it or not, we, as parents, aunts, grandparents and friends are role models to the teenagers/young adults in our lives. When looked at through this lens, what a unique opportunity that’s been given to us!

However, the book warns whenever parents are too busy or when extended family moves away, or when there is no connection with adult role models, peer influence and media will win every time.*

Teens are desperate for love, acceptance, grace, discipline and boundaries. They also crave a healthy, functional life rhythm.

But most importantly, they were created to know their Creator in a personal relationship. They desperately need the positive influence of God’s Word gently shared and lived out before them. They need to see what it means to live by Scriptural convictions. They need to see Biblical principles at work in our everyday lives and decisions.

So that one day, our God will become their God.

God promises when we make His Word our plumb line; our North Star; our starting point of determining right from wrong, it will have an impact on our families.

I’m counting on it. Because it’s all I have in combating the world’s continual indoctrination.

By the way, when your teen says, “Mom, your judging…” Know this is a message straight from the heart of the world. (This has been said to me.)

My response?

Without apology. Without flinching. As loving as I can be, “No, no sweet one, I’m discerning right from wrong. And that’s wrong. That behavior, if continued, will bring years of hardship and heartache…”

*How to Get your Teen to Talk to You, Connie Grigsby and Kent Julian (p26)