One afternoon a few weeks ago I encouraged myself to go shopping to buy some new spring/summer clothes for travel.

OKAY.   I know that I am in the minority regarding shopping:  I really dread it.  (However, I know there are others like me because they have shared their secret dread with me.    But that is a topic for another day.)  

After several hours of trying on clothes, I finally found myself standing in line to purchase my goods, not something or some place I ever want to be on a weekday afternoon.  BUT – 

The man in front of me, around 50 years of age, was standing in line to return several items for his wife in the ladies department.  Everything was going well until the wife stopped her shopping and came over to speak sharply to her husband about not bringing in the correct bag.  He calmly stated  that he brought the bags that were laying in the backseat of the car and he didn’t see anything else.  Whereas she proceeded to tell him that the correct bag was “back there” and he “just couldn’t see it.”  It wasn’t so much her words but her tone and demeaning attitude in response to him.  The wife demanded the keys and huffed off back to the car.  Needless to say, the sales clerk and I were very uncomfortable having to witness this grown man’s pain.  He tried to make a funny but there was nothing funny about a fit of the flesh and a disrespectful wife.

My heart and soul ached for this lady, too, for I have been that disrespectful wife with my hand on my hip and my eyes rolling in response to my husband.  I might not have shown my behavior in a department store, but I certainly had displayed fleshly attitudes in front of my young children.  I knew this one lesson was going to be hard on her and her entire family.   

The scripture in Romans tells us that to be carnally minded is death.  I didn’t understand that scripture until I experiencing it the hard way.  

Some examples?

• First speaking your mind and then thinking later.  
• Believing your point is more important than another’s and should be heard.  
•  Looking on the outside like you have surrendered, but truly on the inside you are just plotting how to have your own way. (Yep:  passive-aggressive behavior.)
• Controlling and manipulating situations and circumstances so that you never have to take responsibility for your own actions.

The Word states that this type of heartfelt attitude is DEATH. Your marriage will suffer because of the lack of respect you have for your husband.

Now here is the hope from the Word:

If you ask most women around the globe what do they really desire in their marriage, many would reply:  peace and balance in their homes.

So, what does spiritually minded mean?

• Asking the Lord to help you to control your tongue and facial actions. James 3:3
•  Start esteeming others more than yourself. Phil.2:3
• Share your frustrations and pains with the Lord and hopefully a trusted older woman in the Lord.
• Give your husband a gift that he might not deserve – unconditional respect and honor. Ephesians 5:33.  Believe me, he will lay down his life for you if you or your children were in harm’s way.

Today, girlfriend, ask the Lord to show you where pride and manipulation have entered into your heart and thought life.   Then, say no to death and yes to a spiritually-minded LIFE!